Managing Paradox
Two contrary facts can both be true at the same time.
One of the biggest lies we tell ourselves as individuals or leaders is that in order for us to be right, they must be wrong. It’s a basic self-protection instinct that not only keeps people apart, but it also causes us to make bad decisions that hurt us.
Are you Skilled, Unskilled, or Overusing Paradox?
The three boxes below come from the book For Your Improvement by Micheal M. Lombardo and Robert W. Eichenger, 3rd Edition, 2000, page 239. They contain observable behaviors and impacts others could say about you. When you read these, which reflect how you believe others see you? Or better yet, ask others to tell you which describe you.
Managing Paradox
UNSKILLED BEHAVIORS
Not very flexible; can’t shift gears readily; is a one-trick pony (although great at that trick)
Believes strongly in personal consistency and following a few principles
Tries to get everything done one way; doesn’t take a balanced approach
May be seen as rigidly following and overdoing their one best way; may rely too much on personal strengths
Has trouble shifting modes of behavior in the same meeting or situation
Managing Paradox
SKILLED BEHAVIORS
Can act in ways that seem contradictory
Is very flexible and adaptable when facing tough calls
Can combine seeming opposites like being compassionately tough, stand up for self without trampling others, set strong but flexible standards
Can act differently depending on the situation
Is seen as balanced despite the conflicting demands of the situation
Managing Paradox
OVERUSED SKILL
May be seen as two-faced or wishy-washy
May change too easily from one style or mode to another
May misread what skills are called for
May confuse people who see them across different settings
May be misinterpreted
These observations and categorizations are compiled from decades of research by Lombardo and Eichinger, plus others. Where your responses fall gives you some indication of your skill level in Managing Paradox.
If you find that very few of these behaviors apply to you then you are UNTESTED. The good news is that if you come across situations in the future requiring you to balance competing aims you have a model that shows what SKILLED looks like.
If you find a few of the UNSKILLED behaviors define you then you are UNSKILLED. The good news is you are now aware; the next step is to decide to care and want to do something about it. When you read SKILLED you can see what good looks like, that makes a good destination. The booklists multiple remedies.
If any of the OVERUSED behaviors show up, then you are OVERUSING this skill. An overuse of a skill is typically tied to a skill deficiency in another skill. The more that show up, the more skill gaps you have in other areas. There is a defined list of potential skill gaps that you are compensating for with this skill. This is just as important to fix as unskilled; you are not achieving the objectives listed in skilled when you are overusing and compensating for other skill gaps.
If you have a consistent pattern of skilled behaviors, then you are SKILLED in Managing Paradox. If four or more show up in your profile you can consider it a strength. This is a good place to be, but be aware that if a new situation, role, client, or employer comes along your behaviors may change.